What does it take to produce giving kids?

Can we teach kids to give away their money, even if we offer them nothing in return?

I want to believe that we can.

The background: Last September we allowed the kids to choose where their offering would go from among 10 causes. They chose four, and between the start of school and Christmas, raised a whopping $289. The kids were disappointed in themselves. Several quickly pointed out that if everyone brought a dollar a week, we would surpass our four-month total in only two weeks.

So when we then conducted the activity again, and the kids chose four new causes to receive their giving for the first half of this year, we added an element: the classes, together, needed to set a goal and brainstorm some things that would motivate and remind them to reach it. Many suggested fund-raisers. Others said there should be a competition. Others said prizes should be given to the kid who raises the most money.

Their ideas were imaginative, and well-intentioned. But if we do those things - is it still offering?

And so I ask, is it possible to teach kids to give away their money, even if we offer them nothing in return?

Can we produce the "cheerful givers" that God loves (2 Corinthians 9:7) not by incentivizing, but just by keeping the need in front of them?

And I'm talking about genuine giving, not an automatic, unthinking, oh-yeah 10% contribution. Tithing is a great habit - but these kids are too young for giving to be just "habit". They are just beginning to discover the value of money, understand the fact that it's scarce and that it gives people power and can corrupt them. They need to grapple with the place money has in their hearts and what, if anything, they're willing to give it up for - even if the only gain is the vague, warm sense that you've helped someone who needed it more than you.

Have a serious conversation about money with your kid. Where does it rank in their heart? Are they materialistic? Do they judge other people by their apparent wealth? What they say might shock you, but listen. And then teach them to give - but not with words.

One of the greatest gifts you can give your kid is to teach them how to be compassionate through firsthand exposure to people in need. In an hour's drive you can be amidst crushing poverty at the dump in Tijuana. In 15 minutes you can sit among the discouraged and hopeless at Bread of Life Rescue Mission.

I must close with an awful confession that speaks to why we must always keep needs prominent and visible.

In 2001 I had just moved to Washington, DC, and was having a discussion with some co-workers, one of whom wanted to raise awareness of the AIDS crisis in Africa. I told him it was Africa's problem. I was certainly a Christian at that time in my life. But my attitude wasn't at all Christlike. It wasn't that I didn't have a caring heart - it's that I didn't know what I should be caring about.

Can we teach kids to give away their money, even if we offer them nothing in return?

I want to believe that we can. We'll find out if I'm right.